BECAUSE I’M WORTH IT …
Last week at the Dentist’s Surgery
I picked up a glossy beauty mag.
It told me what I should do
When I started to sag.
Don’t bother with diets and gyms, it said
Go straight for the surgeon’s knife
Your youthful looks will help you cope
With modern competitive life.
A simple face lift is so common
Everyone has one in this day.
It removes all lines and wrinkles –
The years just fall away.
Farewell drooping bosom;
Implants will enlarge and lift your bust,
Liposuction reduces spare tyres –
Well that’s an absolute must.
A botox jab may be toxic, but
Signs of age vanish without pain,
However, if the dose is wrong
You may never smile or frown again.
The whole works cost an arm and a leg
More than a luxury cruise,
But you know you are worth it,
So treat yourself, you can’t lose.
I’m solvent! I’ve paid my debts
I’m beginning to forget all the pain,
So now I’m told to start saving
To do it again – and again.
September 2002
